All over... possible relief?

Well, the sale is over and the house is empty.  It makes me sad to think of the house with nothing in it.  It has probably never been empty, at least since it was built.  For some reason this makes me tear up and I feel so sad and imagine that the house must misse all that stuff and probably feels lonely.  More tears.  Then I move on to how upset all the people who lived in the house must be feeling/would be feeling if they could see it.  More tears.  I imagine my Grandma and how she loved that house and all those things... More tears.

And then a great moment of clarity hits.

Perhaps my grandma didn't love that house or the things in it.

I think she is/would be greatly relieved, possibly even happy, if she could see the house all clean and empty like it is now.

She never stated this out right or said much to make me think this is 100% true, but the more I think about it the more I think I am onto something.  The house was not her family home, it was her Mother-In-Law's home.  The house in which  her husband grew up and when she moved in, her Mother-In-Law lived downstairs! I think her Mother-In-Law moved out of the upstairs to the downstairs so Grandma and Grandpa could live upstairs.  I am not sure of this, but I think its true.  

So she is a young bride, mother of one, two, or three little kids and she moves into a house full of stuff.  Crammed with stuff.  Stuff her Mother-In-Law used/loved/lived with. Stuff with history and clearly STUFF THAT MUST NOT BE MOVED. I don't think Grandma felt a lot of freedom to move things, sell things, buy new things. I am pretty sure that a new bed and a new sofa where the only big furniture items she ever purchased. I imagine she didn't feel much freedom to go through cupboards and drawers to put things away and make more space for herself.

She was constantly trying to get us to put our names on things, and even take things.  All her children have lots of furniture and items from the house that she gave to them over the years.

She once told me she loved the Southwestern style and she always wanted a home decorated in that style.  717 was a far cry from Southwestern (minus the Navajo pottery).

So yeah.  I think she feels relieved that it is all gone.  Finally, someone did something about it and now no else has to bear the burden of so much stuff.

I still feel sad about it all being gone.  I still wish we could have kept it, wish we could keep the house.  But somehow thinking about my grandma possibly feeling relieved has helped....  thinking about what it must have been like for her to move into that house as a young bride, dealing with little kids and a Mother-In-Law (and an Aunt who also lived downstairs) has given me a bit of perspective and helped me not completely romanticize the house and the whole situation. After all,  my experience of the house and the situation is all romanticized.  I just thought it was amazing and wonderful etc.  But I did not have to live there and deal with it every day.

I could be completely wrong and we will never know, but I think I might be onto something here...